SOOOO tired...one night of wonderful followed by one night of terrible. That's the way it goes I suppose...

haha...so Caleb was wonderful last night...we'll see how he is tonight. Already for the past two feedings he's done his, "I'm super hungry but I'm going to start throwing a major fit a minute into eating...". Grrreat. I think he's over-tired because he didn't take good naps today. He's definitely tired right now...it's 7:30 and he just finished a feeding so I'm wondering if he's going down permanently rightnow for the night or if he'll be up for another feeding at 10-something. Part of me wants to try to keep him until his next feeding so he knocks out after that one...we'll see what he does...he runs the show, not us!

Last night we had to check that Caleb was still alive...lol! He slept from about 9:45 to 3:00!!!! He ate when he got up, then went back to sleep until 6:15, ate again, and slept until 9:20!! WOW!!!!

Today he was good in the morning time, then after around 1:30ish he just wanted to be carried....he'd fall asleep, I'd try to put him down, and he'd fuss again. I tried the blow dryer thing to make him sleep on his own but it didn't work today. Oh well.

Last night Dave fed him at 3:00 and he started to fuss after he was done eating...I came to get him and he settled down...Dave doesn't like that...especially because it seemed like Caleb was fighting to get away from him, then when I grabbed him he started nuzzling his face into my neck and then fell asleep. I told Dave it's just because Caleb is used to me and my smell since he's with me all day so to try to offset that we have to have Dave carry and be with him a lot after he gets home from work so that Caleb will get used to him too. I'm thinking this same thing is going to happen when Caleb gets used to my mom and her smell when he's with her for most of the day. I'll be sad when Caleb cries with me and stops when my mom grabs him but I think that's just natural for a baby...I'll have to remember that!

Yay for 4 hour sleeps and some solid naps today!!! I'm praying that his sleeps continue to be good tonight. Last night we fed him at around 8:45 and he went down before 10. He didn't wake up again until 1:45...he ate, then woke up again at 5:30. Getting up twice as opposed to 3-4 times is MUCH better!!!

Today he took some good naps...at least 30 minute naps, which is wonderful for him. I was bouncing him to get him to go to sleep this afternoon (around 1:30ish) and then I had to pee so I put him on the counter on a towel next to me...even though it was just for a little bit, he started to fuss so I turned on the blow dryer...and lo and behold, he fell asleep!!!! I left him there for about five minutes contemplating if I should pick him up or just let him take a nap there (with me in there with him, of course!) but decided napping on the bathroom counter is not a good idea. So I picked him and the blow dryer up and carried them to our bedroom. I put him down, turned on the blow dryer, and watched to see if he would put himself to sleep again. I also gave him the sports bra I wear to bed so he had my smell near him. He fussed a bit, looked around, then after about ten minutes, went to sleep on his own and slept for a solid half hour!!! Yay. So I'm thinking we should put him in his crib as he gets sleepy tonight after his last feed and then turn on the blow dryer and let him start getting used to sleeping on his own instead of in our arms...granted, though, that then makes him become dependent on the sound of the hair dryer to fall asleep...we'll see.

I was just telling Dave today, "Remember how he used to freakin' cry almost all day before?? Thank goodness he's getting better!" It's true...from the time my mom left until now, he's grown up a lot. She left when he was about 6 weeks old, which they say is about the height of terribleness for a colicky kid...and that it dissipates and then finally disappears around 3 months of age (or goes on till about 6 months for some). I dunno if it's colic that he has, but his fussiness spells are mainly in the evening now...and it's getting less and less...or we're getting smarter and smarter and nipping it before it gets full blown.

I keep thinking that the first month is the terrible part and that I'm glad it's over...now people keep saying, "Oh, wait til he crawls and walks...then it's all over!" Hehe...I guess there's going to be goods and bads at each age...

Caleb's signature hair is gone but he's still a cutie...he looks like a big boy now (not a fat boy, an older boy!). Still doing 3 hour sleeps...it's kind of weird how regimented he is...last night, 11:45, 2:45, 5:45...no joke. Nutts. We are not sure why he's doing the 3 hour thing again but oh well. Don't know how that's going to work once I'm working again though...hopefully he figures it out soon.

New developments...he is so talkative now and makes so many different facial expressions...so cute! Today I had him in the bathroom in front of the mirror and he just talked and talked and looked at himself and made different expressions. It was so cute and funny.

Still doing his evening time fits...about 6ish we know he'll start fussing hard. I think it's a combination of releasing all his pent up over-stimulation from throughout the day and being overly tired since his napping is so crappy.

Dave was looking at pics I take of Caleb during the day and asked if he can stay home and play with Caleb while I go to work and watch his class...no way!!! Hehe. I think I'll have issues when I have to leave Caleb for the whole day! I'm also wondering how I'm going to do grading and prepping for class...and take care of Caleb, cook, and clean. It'll be interesting...I've been more productive than I thought I would be, but throwing work in the mix will be a challenge...oh well.

I'm still having to lose about 10-12 pounds to get back to pre-pregnancy weight...I have sorted my clothes...put away some of the maternity clothes and put my other clothes in piles of "may fit again" and "definitely won't fit again" and "too hoochie to wear anymore". Lol.

holy smokes....3 hour sleeps at night and tons of fussiness...what's going on???? we don't know...today has been terrible and it's only 9:56 a.m. whew.

In an effort to give Caleb INSTANT GRATIFICATION (lol), I was premixing milk and refrigerating them. Lately, Caleb has been having major issues with his stomach and would start eating, then start screaming and fussing as if in pain. So...putting two and two together, (even though I didn't think this was the cause cuz sometimes he'll eat the cold milk like nothing) we decided to try giving him room temp milk again...just mixing it as he wanted to eat. I was scared cuz we started it because he would throw a major fit when the milk didn't come quick enough...but last night we tried it out and it was wonderful...he ate calmly, peacefully, and more quickly than usual. No fits. Even today, with his shots and the fussiness from that, there was no fussiness with eating. His appetite seems to have slowed a bit compared to the past couple days (not eating as often) but that could be a side effect from the shots. I feel so bad that he was in pain cuz of our mistake...

Today's shots experience wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be...he screamed, but his fussing stopped as soon as I picked him up and he promptly passed out hard. He slept for a long time and had only one truly screaming, fussing, crying, holding breath spell...we thought he'd be like that the whole day. Right now he's in his bouncer, smiling, talking, chillin...no fever so far...we've given him the Tylenol twice and will give him another dose before bed time to hopefully keep it that way.

So cute...on his bouncer thing, if he hits the hanging animals, it will light up and play music for a little bit. We're trying to see if he's making the connection that if he hits it, it will respond. So far he's done it several times...could just be coincidence but I'll believe it's cuz he's a genius. Lol.

Two months - 13 lbs 13 oz and 24.5 inches. Average size for a three month old baby. I thought he'd be closer to 15 lbs! Doctor said he's very proportional, so that's good.

I'm such an idiot...I know that today may very well be super difficult cuz Caleb's getting his shots...so what do I do? Wake up at 1:40 a.m. and go check on him instead of savoring every last minute of sleep...he doesn't wake up to eat until 2:40, but of course since I already got up to check on him, my mind starts racing with thoughts and I can't go back to sleep...in fact, even after I feed him and put him back down, I can't go back to sleep immediately. Then I wake up for his feeding at 5:20 and instead of going back to sleep after I feed him and put him down, here I am at the computer cuz I figure no sense I try sleep cuz I'll just toss and turn. So I'll be super tired later on (most likely tomorrow, cuz my tiredness always catches up to me the following day), but my dumb brain just won't let me wind down and sleep cuz I keep thinking about how hard it might possibly be today. What a lolo. I just saw the email forward about not worrying about things cuz if it doesn't happen you've worried for nothing...

Some observations about Caleb...

He loves to look around...he's so curious. This, though, is a bad thing when it comes time to go to sleep...he fights his sleep so much to keep looking around. We sometimes cover his eyes with our hand in front of his line of vision so that he will go back to sleep.

Something is wrong with his tummy. He has a lot of gas pains it seems. So did Dave when he was a baby...in fact, he still has stomach issues...he says when it's cold his stomach gets sore...I always thought he was lying, but apparently his brother has the same issues.

He likes to be cold...he loves air conditioned places. I can't imagine how fussy he's going to be in the heat of summer. We'll have to take him to the pool to cool him down or install an a.c. in his bedroom....the first option is cheaper.

Though he loves to suck, he still can't consistently keep his hand or his paci in his mouth. It soothes him, but he isn't coordinated enough yet...we can't wait until he is. Dave's invention should be a paci holder...a suggestion was to have one that has elastic that can be adjusted to go around the baby's head. Much better than taping the paci to the baby's face...lol.

Friday night...not bad, I guess, in comparison for the hell of Friday afternoon...

Saturday...pretty good....eruption at the 1:30 a.m. feeding, but other than that...okay. Went to Grandma and Grandpa Colmenares for a few hours while Dave and I chilled at home...we intended to take a nap, but by the time I cooked, we ate, watched a video, and showered, it was time to pick Caleb up...

Sunday...so far, so good. My Aunty Alma and Uncle Gary visited and Aunty got him to take a nap, then fed and calmed him down after he woke up. Yay. We took him for a walk in his stroller to KFC to pick up lunch...he started yelling up a storm on our way back, but going there he was okay. I gotta MacGyver a blanket and some toys to the sun shade so he doesn't get too much sun exposure and will have entertaining things to look at. We'll go up to the grandparent's house for dinner tonight...trying to get him comfortable with being up there too since he'll be there for some of the time when I go back to work.

Monday...hopefully we can take him out somewhere with his stroller so we can walk around and enjoy the holiday.

what a shitty day....

Caleb is so smart that he knows exactly when Dave and I are starting to feel comfortable in a routine....so he changes it up so we don't get too comfortable!!!

So for a little while now he's been doing a long sleep, followed by his regular 3 hour sleeps...it was nice because that long sleep was definitely refreshing for us...BUT for the past two nights, no more long sleep!!! The first night, we fed him at 745 and he went down maybe an hour or so after that. Fine, we think, he'll get up again at around 2, which is normal. NOPE. He got up at 12:30...started eating, and threw a fit before settling down to drink again. Then up again at 4:30...not too bad.

Last night was another story...we fed him 5 ounces at 7:30 because we've been finding that after his 4 ounces he is still sucking hard and cries a little when we pull the bottle away. So we feed him, he's fussy, goes to sleep...wakes us up at 12:00, starts to eat nicely, then starts SCREAMING bloody murder. Dave has him at this point and is trying everything to calm him down, but his fatigue is getting the best of him and I decide to take him. Now, we've noticed a little bit that he'll immediately calm down when I take him...he'll fuss a little, but not nearly the bloody murder yells he gives when Dave has him. He calms down, I give him back to Dave (he has to get used to his daddy too!), and he starts howling again. Frick. So I take him back, calm him down, and eventually he starts eating again...I hand him off to Dave and he finishes his bottle and goes back to sleep. At 4:30, he's up again, and fussing again after I start to feed him. He has to be calmed, burped, and then calmed again before he proceeds to inhale another 5 ounces. This morning, he gets up around 7:30, eats a little bit, fusses, eats a little bit more, chills...he only eats about 2 ounces so now his feeding is all crazy and I don't know if I should be feeding him more or less or what...dangit.

Okay, he's had it with his playmat so I better go grab the little guy...

Sometimes I just sit and look at Caleb in wonderment. He's amazing. It's so cute when he's just had a meal, burped, and is in that content phase...he just coos and smiles and it's just awesome. I know my descriptive words suck, but words can't really describe just how nutts it is. Hehe. What an English teacher I am.

Even Dave gets all mushy and just hugs the crap out of him. It's cute.

I know I'm biased (all moms are) but I swear Caleb is super attentive and aware...he's a curious guy and always observing his surroundings. He gets so excited by movement of objects...like right now he's in his bouncer watching the frog and monkey move side to side and up and down and he gets so excited...kicking his legs and flailing his arms and smiling and talking. It's so cute!!!

Here are some goals I have for Caleb, after hearing about where kindergarteners (dude, how do you spell that???) need to be in order to move up to 1st grade...I want him to go to school (he'll probably be in junior k since he's late born) knowing his letters (recognize them at least, maybe sounds), know his name in writing, know his colors, shapes, count to 100 (lol...that's a lofty one), and be able to rhyme. My mom says Caleb is going to get lots of slaps cuz I'm going to want to teach him and get frustrated when he doesn't want to learn...lol. I want Caleb to ENJOY reading and I want to make sure we read with him everyday and every night. Am I going to be an overbearing mom??? Probs. I'm just an overbearing person in general and I have HIGH expectations. Dave will balance me out and be the chill parent who has a lot of fun with him. Hehe.

I don't want to jinx it, but DANG...the older Caleb gets, the easier it gets!!! I don't know if he's behaving the same and we are just more used to it, or if it's that he (and WE) get more sleep now so it doesn't seem so bad, but now I believe what people were saying when they said that it would get better. At the time, during his screaming, fussing, nothing-pleases-him time, I was highly skeptical. Now, though, this is what mommyhood is as I envisioned it!! To see him smile, especially at me, when he hears my voice, that's just cool. To see him get excited when Dave comes home and he hears his voice, that's cool. He seems so much more content, much happier...like a regular little baby. Granted, he still fusses and there are times we just don't know what's going on with him, but there are now just as many good episodes as crazy ones! Thank goodness because I was beginning to wonder what was going to happen in the 4th quarter when I have to go back to work too.

Kay, now that I wrote this, he's going to throw a big fit and get us all flustered again...lol.

We abandoned Caleb last night...we bought a baby monitor and slept in our own room instead of in the room with him. I was a little freaked out...went to check on him a few times...but it all worked out. Dave did his first feeding at 2:00, then I went in for the 5:00 feeding, where he proceeded to eat little bit, fuss, then fall asleep with the paci instead of actually eating. I pulled him on the bed with me (in his room) and slept there instead of going back to our room. Dave came and said bye to us when he left in the morning and Caleb and I slept until about 7:45.

Right now Caleb's taking a nap...he took a 45 minute nap earlier today and now he's been down for about 20 minutes. Much nicer to have the monitor than to have to keep running to the room every few minutes to check on him! On Saturday when I went to class he slept for a lot of the day with Dave...when I got home he had been napping for almost two hours!!! What the heck!!!!

If I counted correctly, this is Caleb's 8th week. We go to the doctor next week Tuesday for his two month check up and his first round of vaccinations. That's going to be interesting. Dave is supposed to go to school that day but I'm trying to convince him to come with me to the doctor's...we'll see.

Just when we thought Caleb was getting over his yelling/crying/wailing/holding his breath craziness...it's back...with a vengeance. Lol. Well, it's not so laughable in the heat of the moment, but it's laughable that we thought it was over and done with. Rookie parents.

He is still having the hardest time with naps...I swear his longest naps (and I'm talking not being carried and held kine naps) are 15 minutes long. We took him to town today because I had a doctor's appt...and most babies sleep in the car...not Caleb. Well, not for very long, anyways. And once we hit traffic, it was over and he started having a fit. Man.

He is having more calm waking periods, though. He's getting more smiley...and is actually able to chill out in his bouncy seat and look at the fan or the rainforest thingy and entertain himself for a while. His favorite place is still the bathroom...it's the noise of the vent and the nipple-shaped light fixture that he loves. Dave actually put his bouncy seat i the doorway of the bathroom to keep him occupied while I was at class yesterday and it lasted for about 15 minutes. Lol.

We're baptizing him on Saturday...I'm scared that he's going to freak out and throw a huge fit during the whole thing.

He still can't hold his paci in his mouth too well...I dunno if a month and a half old should be able to hold a paci in their mouth, but it sure would help him be able to soothe himself since he still lacks the coordination to hold his hand or finger in his mouth consistently...dunno if he's supposed to be able to do that yet...

Dangit, it's 8:25 and he's taking a nap now...in fact, this is his longest nap of the day...which means he'll probably be up in the nighttime or early morning, not wanting to go back to sleep. He's supposed to eat soon...if he doesn't wake up to eat, I'm waking him up so he can eat and go back down for the night. His longest sleeps are still 4.5 hours for one stretch of the night. Still eating 28-30 oz. per day.

TIRED. Today was a long day. Caleb was a fuss bucket, and he proved to me that he still knows how to YELL. He wanted to be carried all day long, wouldn't take a nap longer than 15 minutes, and just was in a general bad mood. Highlight of the day was during one calm, happy period when I was able to read him Dr. Seuss' ABC book...he actually smiled a lot during the reading.

Dave came home, Caleb continued his antics. We gave him a bath and a bottle, which put him to sleep for maybe an hour. Just a few minutes ago he was fussing hard so we gave him a dose of Colic Calm...he is now asleep on the couch. We hope that he will behave tonight because we have to go to St. Peter and Paul for a class/interview to get him baptized so he's staying home with his grandma Colmenares...and this is the first time he's alone with someone other than me, Dave, or my mom...and he threw a huge fit yesterday evening when the family was over and Dave's mom had a hell of a time trying to calm him down...which didn't work and eventually I took him and got him settled. She finally got to see what he's REALLY like. He'll eat again in another half hour or so...so at least that will take some of the time that we're gone. I just hope he doesn't fuss the whole time we're gone. I'm going to pray hard while we're gone...

Caleb knew when Gramma was leaving and when he needed to act good so that Mommy and Daddy didn't slap his head...hehe. He was a good boy...relatively...for the past four days. He still hates to take a nap...fights his sleep and is a fuss bucket except when being held. He'll take a good nap sometime in the afternoon, then he'll be hella fussy in the early evening (around 5-6:30ish). He'll go down for the night around 8-10p, stay down until about 1, then be up again at 4ish and 7ish. I want to cut out that 4ish feeding before I go back to work...we'll see. Tonight we were going to try to give him 5 ounces instead of 4 for his 8-10ish feeding and his 4ish feeding, but that lil sucker is sleeping right now (8:30) and it looks like he might be down for the night. He had a people filled weekend (Sat and Sun we had people over) so we think that tired him out. I think he's sensitive to noise...on Thurs and Fri I kept the tv turned down low for most of the day and he seemed to be more content. So tempermental!

I'm finding that I love weekends even more now and I wait for 3:00 to roll around so Dave will be home. Soon he's starting track season so he'll be having practice on Mon, Tues, and Thurs...which sucks, but he really wants to do it. I have class on Tuesdays so he'll have to work his track practice around that...luckily this year he should have some help with coaching so that will be good.

Took him to Sam's Club and Circuit City today...we know, he's only a month and a half and doctor said keep him away from big crowds until after two months...so we kept a blanket over his head for the most part, but we had to get out for a little bit. It wasn't too bad...he mainly just slept since we were carrying him. I'll have to start getting him used to the stroller but it's been so cold that I don't want to take him out for a walk. Hopefully this week will be warmer (but then again, I have to worry about sun exposure) so I can start taking him walking...the walking will do me good too!

My left hand area between my thumb and pointer finger is super sore...I think it's sprained from when I lift him up when I grab under his arms. Heavy boy!